Date: February 12, 2015
Umm Salihah Ahmed, a blog writer and a loving mother tells about a flexible reward chart on pleasurable parenting. The content of the blog can be read in an abridged format as follows: Children are the focus of our life and we are all on the way to parent them in the best lovable and pleasurable way. She is a compassionate devotee of Islam religion and believes that children are the blessings of Allah and thus we have to treat them in a divine way. Just wipe out the feelings of stress, worries, guilty and cruelty and to start dedicating our life to parent our children. We have to understand the faults of our children, so that we can correct them timely. At the same time we can celebrate their strengths, be gentle in the way we guide them and recognise when the right way to discipline requires a loving approach that tries to identify why a child might be rebelling rather than punishment. The best way to have a good parent is to agree with the qualities of our children first and to lead them to a positive approach to life. By accepting the continuous request from her kids, she has prepared a reward chart for them. The chart incorporated nine broad blogcategories of activity that could generate a reward (or merit) and each child had a different coloured dot to identify who did something good. She also added a bar across the top to show weeks from now to the end of the year.
"The best of what a man leaves behind are three: a righteous child who supplicates for him, ongoing charity the reward of which reaches him, and knowledge that is acted upon after him."
Sunan Ibn Mājah
"Every day two angels come down from Heaven and one of them says, 'O Allah! Compensate every person who spends in Your Cause,' and the other (angel) says, 'O Allah! Destroy every miser.'"
Sahih Bukhari
This is a blog by a mother about her child’s behaviour at school and her reply to the child to make him the best boy in the world. The incident was all about her child Gorgeous’ trouble making at school by hitting the toilet door while two boys were found together inside the toilet. She realized that best to steer or discipline my children when necessary using reasoning or by displaying anger in a non-violent manner, rather than by hitting. She says that hitting is not the most constructive way to parent and can lead to children expressing their own anger in inappropriate ways such as hitting others and not knowing how to express their frustration appropriately as adults. She also reminds that gentleness with children is part of the sunnah of our beloved Prophet. Now a days the news media channels are continuously streaming stories on child abuse related to sexting and pornography. The government indicates that the development of children is being impacted by an increasingly sexualised environment. Wiping out this bad environment is out of sight. But we can lead our kids in the protected environment with our guidance and affection. And this is a message to all the mothers in this world that moms are the best of their children so that they can share the things or events which hurt them from anywhere and she can cure their wounds of bad feelings.
Read MoreParenting is the most admirable and challenging task that a family need to work out a lifetime. We are living in the very post modern culture of 21st century that follows a different and dazzled way. The biggest challenge that a parent has to understand is that we are living in a world very different from the one in which we grew up. Every now and then, our children are living in a globalized, materialized and a superpower world of technology. The major global changes that we face are information exchange and threatening technology empowerment. We live in the information overloaded age and our daily walks on the information super highway and we definitely need to thank the technology for having the complete picture on every walks of the life. But what we need is to have the knowledge on what information to believe in reality and what to believe as just propaganda. Secondly we can say that technology is a challenging scenario. Technology can make life easy. But it can distract and increase false sense of satisfaction to us. Facebook and such social networking sites share billions of posts a day. But do you think, all the shares are informative or justifiable? Never can it be. The aftereffects of the thoughtless words are serious and severe. While posting such things on virtual platforms, always keep in that technology cannot replace wisdom. Natural wisdom never can be replaced by artificial intelligence and vice versa. Use your intellect to understand the event and color the scene to see the whole world.
Read MoreUmm Salihah a mom to five children is always curious about life’s little magic. She would love to learn and inspire from the small as well as bug incidents happened in her life. In her opinion blog-happymuslimah.com, she talks about her love, learn and inspire lists. Umm Salihah love to travel and enjoy the travel experience of others. She loves to see and get inspired from great travel images shared through Whatsapp and social media. She loves everything passed through her life. She has got a passion for learning about human behavior, brain, personality, intelligence and socialization. But it had never occurred in a state to her to consider psychology from an Islamic perspective. Soon after she listened to two lectures by Ustadh Nauman Ali Khan on the Islamic view of Psychology, they really made her to think more. Now she is trying to devour anything on the intersection between Islam and Psychology that she can find.
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