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Pleasurable Parenting: Flexible Reward Chart

Date: February 12, 2015

Umm Salihah Ahmed, a blog writer and a loving mother tells about a flexible reward chart on pleasurable parenting. The content of the blog can be read in an abridged format as follows: Children are the focus of our life and we are all on the way to parent them in the best lovable and pleasurable way. She is a compassionate devotee of Islam religion and believes that children are the blessings of Allah and thus we have to treat them in a divine way. Just wipe out the feelings of stress, worries, guilty and cruelty and to start dedicating our life to parent our children. We have to understand the faults of our children, so that we can correct them timely. At the same time we can celebrate their strengths, be gentle in the way we guide them and recognise when the right way to discipline requires a loving approach that tries to identify why a child might be rebelling rather than punishment. The best way to have a good parent is to agree with the qualities of our children first and to lead them to a positive approach to life. By accepting the continuous request from her kids, she has prepared a reward chart for them. The chart incorporated nine broad blogcategories of activity that could generate a reward (or merit) and each child had a different coloured dot to identify who did something good. She also added a bar across the top to show weeks from now to the end of the year.

Precious Gifts a Person Leaves Behind

"The best of what a man leaves behind are three: a righteous child who supplicates for him, ongoing charity the reward of which reaches him, and knowledge that is acted upon after him."

Sunan Ibn Mājah

Angelic Daily Prayers for Generosity

"Every day two angels come down from Heaven and one of them says, 'O Allah! Compensate every person who spends in Your Cause,' and the other (angel) says, 'O Allah! Destroy every miser.'"

Sahih Bukhari

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Islamic New Year, The month of MUHARRAM, And Ashura

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PARENTS IN OUR LIFE

Islam is a religion which teaches us to be dutiful and to show respect to our parents. Allah (SWT) has gifted us with parents which we did not choose, instead HE chose them for us. The Supreme Maker took this decision as a test for them as well as for us. This is the reason why Allah (SWT) says we should be kind to our parents. Parents are given the next highest status after Allah (SWT) and his Prophets. We are blessed with parents who guide us and love us from the beginning of our lives. A baby needs the guidance and support of a human being for survival. If we were not looked after by our mother we would have died. It is the duty of the parent to feed the child and accommodate the child and to have a good relationship with the child. It is said in a hadith: A man came to the Prophet (SAW) and asked him: _“O” Messenger of Allah, who among people is more deserving of my good company?” He said, “Your mother.” The man asked, “Then who?” The Prophet said, “Your mother.” The man asked, “Then who?” The Prophet said, “Your mother.” The man asked, “Then who?” The Prophet said, “Then your father". (Bukhari and Muslim) Children are a trust given to the parents by the ALMIGHTY. HE has given them the power to guide them and to build them as a good human being, but He has given the parents a boundary step which they should not cross to achieve something they want as it is the right of the children to make a choice. If the children make a wrong decision it is the duty of the parents to guide them and tell them and to convince them about this choice. A parent should always try to be the role model of the child by doing good things. Parents should be like friends with their children so that they can run to you without fear when they need to tell you something. As our parents do all these for us we owe to them respect and kindness. Even after the death of our parents we should pray, give charity on their behalf and perform dua for them.

WHY GET SICK!

This video describes about the unhealthy eating habits, the main cause of sickness in human body. Islam believes that there is a profound relation between the soul and the body. That’s why we worship with our body and believe in bodily resurrection. So, taking care of the body is very important to the Muslims. Most of the sickness today is because of the devices and machines we are using in our daily life. People don’t go out in nature, they don’t feel nature, they don’t breathe properly, they don’t exercise. Interestingly people are getting sick from eating. In surah ‘Araf in the Quran verse number 31, Allah (SWT) says “Eat and drink and do not go in excess, Allah does not love those who excess”. The factor here is how much amount of food we consume. During the Khalifah of Omar (RA), he forbade meat to be eaten two days in a row. But now a day we eat meat every single day. As a result of this over consumption we get sick. Prophet Mohammed (saw) used to exercise, had a flat stomach and he didn’t like fat stomachs. Prophet (saw) once said “The human being (the son of Adam) has not filled any vessel worse than your stomach!” A Muslim should eat as if one third is for food, one third for water and one third for air. Solution is: 1. If we can buy organic, eat organic. 2. Decrease the amount of food we eat. 3. If we can grow our own, of-course we should grow. 4. Read and be very conscious of what we consume.